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一弹接一弹,我乌克兰家乡的缓慢死亡Bomb by Bomb, the Slow Death of My Hometown in Ukraine

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我的家乡——位于乌克兰的克拉马托尔斯克——正一步步走向毁灭。

Bomb by Bomb, the Slow Death of My Hometown in Ukraine It was possible, for a time, to think that Kramatorsk, where I was born and raised, would survive the war mostly unscathed. Not any more.

曾经有一段时间,人们以为我出生并长大的这座城市能够在这场战争中毫发无损地幸存下来……但事实已不再如此。

On the morning of Aug. 4, two Russian guided bombs, each weighing more than 1,000 pounds, struck the residential block where I grew up in Kramatorsk, eastern Ukraine.

8月4日上午,两枚俄罗斯制导炸弹(每枚重达1000多磅)击中了我在克拉马托尔斯克成长的那栋住宅楼。

I learned of the attack from social media, scrolling through videos until I recognized a neighboring building in flames.

我是通过社交媒体得知这一消息的:我不断浏览视频,直到认出旁边那栋着火的建筑。随后,我开始拼命寻找任何关于我的家是否也被摧毁的线索。

Then came the frantic search for any piece of information on whether my home had also been destroyed. Finally, a man who still lives in my building sent me a video, filmed from inside my flat.

最终,一位仍住在同一栋楼里的邻居给我发来了一段从我家内部拍摄的视频:大火虽然没有烧毁我的房子,但爆炸的冲击力却对其造成了严重破坏——地板上到处都是玻璃碎片;厨房的窗框被从墙上震掉了;客厅的窗台完全消失了;就连浴室的瓷砖也出现了裂纹。

The fire had spared it, but not the blast. Shards of glass covered the floor. In the kitchen, the window frame had been torn from the wall.

俄罗斯军队正以缓慢而稳定的速度向克拉马托尔斯克推进。我早就知道,我的童年家园终将陷入战火之中……然而,亲眼目睹自己出生的地方被炸弹摧毁,这种痛苦实在难以承受。

In the living room, the windowsill was gone entirely. Even the bathroom tiles had cracked. Russian forces have been advancing on Kramatorsk slowly but steadily, and I long knew that my childhood home would eventually find itself in the fight.

在长达四年半的战争中,数以百万计的乌克兰民众都经历了同样的痛苦:他们眼睁睁看着自己的家园在战火中逐渐被毁;有些人失去了家园,有些人则仍在努力寻找幸存的亲人或财产。

Still, nothing prepares you for seeing the place you were born torn apart by bombs. This is an experience shared by millions of people across Ukraine over four and a half years of war — those now watching their homes being damaged by the approaching fight, and those who’ve already lost them.

作为一名记者,我曾多次报道过这样的悲剧:西维耶多涅茨克、巴赫穆特、阿夫季夫卡、波克罗夫斯克、科斯蒂安蒂尼夫卡……如今,轮到我的家乡了。

As a journalist, I have covered such stories repeatedly, watching city after city being destroyed: Sievierodonetsk, Bakhmut, Avdiivka, Pokrovsk, Kostiantynivka. Now, it’s my hometown’s turn.

克拉马托尔斯克是一座充满公园与童年回忆的小城市。我记得在炎热的夏日里,我曾在市中心的水池里嬉水;冬天则会在学校附近的山坡上滑雪。每到周末,我和母亲都会步行去当地的农贸市场,购买新鲜的牛奶和自制的奶酪,然后把这些美食当作早餐享用。我们家附近的一家格鲁吉亚餐厅,成了我们家庭聚会的好去处——无论是享用卡恰普里(一种传统美食)和葡萄酒,还是庆祝生日,或是简单地喝杯咖啡。

Kramatorsk is a small city filled with parks and childhood memories. I remember splashing in a fountain in the city center on hot summer days and sledding down the hill near my school in winter. On weekends, my mother and I would walk to the local farmers’ market to buy fresh milk and homemade cheese that we would devour with breakfast. A Georgian restaurant near our home became a favorite spot for family evenings over a khachapuri and wine, a birthday celebration or just a cup of coffee.

然而,一切都在2022年2月24日发生了改变:俄罗斯发动了全面入侵。爆炸声将我的父母从睡梦中惊醒,他们惊慌地给我打电话,询问该怎么办、该去哪里,以及该带些什么东西。

Everything changed on Feb. 24, 2022, when Russia launched its full-scale invasion. Explosions woke my parents in Kramatorsk and they called me in a panic to ask what they should do, where they should go and what they should take with them.

那天我正在100多英里外的马里乌波尔,作为CNN团队的一名记者工作。我试图通过电话组织父母的撤离事宜,告诉他们要带上必备的物品(如文件、换洗衣物以及我们的猫),然后尽快离开这座城市。他们离开公寓时把房间收拾得井井有条,还以为很快就能回来。如今,他们仍滞留在挪威,过着难民的生活。

I was in Mariupol that day, more than 100 miles to the south, working as a producer with a CNN team. Trying to organize my parents’ evacuation over the phone, I told them to pack the essentials — documents, a change of clothes and our cat — and get out of town. They left the apartment tidy, expecting to come back soon. They’re still in Norway today, under refugee status.

战争爆发两个月后,我回到了克拉马托尔斯克,报道俄罗斯军队在顿涅茨克东部地区的军事进展。俄罗斯军队不断推进,一个又一个村庄被占领;炮击几乎成了每天都会发生的事情。那似乎是我最后一次机会回到家乡。

Two months after the war broke out, I returned to Kramatorsk to report on Russian advances in the eastern Donetsk region. Russian troops were closing in, capturing village after village. Shelling had become an almost daily occurrence. It seemed like my last chance to see home.

当我打开公寓的门时,首先注意到的是屋内的气味——以前这里总是弥漫着我母亲烹饪的香气,而现在却充满了空荡荡的感觉。所有东西都积满了灰尘。意识到自己可能再也无法回到这里,我想要带走尽可能多的东西:家庭相册、父亲的棋盘,以及祖母手工绣制的床单……但事实证明,一个人的生活根本无法装进一个行李箱里,所以我不得不放弃很多东西。

When I opened the door, the first thing I noticed was the smell. Our apartment used to smell of my mother’s cooking. Now it smelled empty. Everything was covered in dust. Knowing I might not be able to return, I wanted to take as much as I could: family photo albums, my father’s chessboard, my grandmother’s hand-embroidered bedsheet. But it turned out a life doesn’t fit into a suitcase, and I had to leave much behind.

然而,在我的公寓外面,克拉马托尔斯克的生活依然显得既奇怪又“平凡”:战争的痕迹随处可见——比如汽油短缺,以及超市货架上没有可口可乐(不过我们还是通过黑市买到了这两样东西);不过外卖服务仍在运行,酒店里也住满了记者。

Outside my flat, though, Kramatorsk carried on a life that was both strange and strangely ordinary. There were constant reminders of the war, of course, like gasoline shortages and the absence of Coca-Cola from supermarket shelves; we managed to get both on the black market. But food delivery services still ran, and hotels were full of journalists.

乌克兰军队成功将俄罗斯军队击退,这座城市的安全状况有所改善,居民们也开始陆续返回。克拉马托尔斯克成为了前线工作的记者和人道主义组织工作人员的后勤基地,许多商家也重新开业了,包括我们最喜欢的格鲁吉亚餐厅。随着我去克拉马托尔斯克的次数越来越多,我也会经常去那里吃午饭。

Ukrainian forces pushed the Russian troops back and the city grew safer. Residents began to return. Kramatorsk became a rear base for journalists and humanitarian group staffers working at the front. Businesses reopened, including our favorite Georgian restaurant. As I began visiting Kramatorsk more often, I had lunch there.

坐在我家过去常聚集的那个地方,很容易让人误以为这座城市已经摆脱了战争的阴影:还是那个小镇,还是那家餐厅,还是那个我……但事实证明,那只是个幻觉。

Sitting in the same place my family used to gather, it was easy to believe that Kramatorsk had escaped the fighting. The same town, the same restaurant, the same me. That, it turned out, was an illusion.

我之前在波克罗夫斯克(位于克拉马托尔斯克西南方向约40英里处)就目睹过类似的情景:在俄罗斯军队初次入侵后,波克罗夫斯克也曾暂时恢复了“正常生活”。对于我所在的新闻媒体团队来说,波克罗夫斯克是一个安全的地方——在前线工作一天后,那里可以让人休息、吃饭,过上相对平静的生活。

I had seen it play out before, in the town of Pokrovsk, about 40 miles southwest of Kramatorsk. Pokrovsk, too, had returned to something resembling normal life after the initial Russian invasion. For the news media teams I worked with, Pokrovsk was a safe place, somewhere to sleep and eat a good meal at the end of a day at the front.

但随着战斗的加剧,精确制导炸弹开始频繁袭击波克罗夫斯克。从2024年秋天开始,街道上逐渐变得空无一人,人们纷纷撤离,关闭了自己的家园和店铺。几个月内,波克罗夫斯克彻底变成了空城,只剩下为即将到来的巷战做准备的士兵们。

But as the fighting closed in, guided bombs started to hit Pokrovsk more often. Starting in the fall of 2024, the streets grew emptier as people evacuated and shuttered their homes and businesses. Within months, Pokrovsk had emptied out, inhabited only by the soldiers preparing for the coming street fighting.

在我后来回克拉马托尔斯克的途中,我逐渐发现了一个相同的规律:每当俄罗斯军队逼近时,他们的无人机就会飞到这座城市,甚至飞过我居住的社区(位于城市的东部边缘)。

On my trips back to Kramatorsk, I began to recognize the same pattern in the past few months. As Russian forces pushed closer, their drones began reaching the city, flying through my neighborhood on the eastern edge of the city.

炸弹袭击了我一生都熟悉的地方。今年春天,一次空袭击中了那条我小时候常走的街道——那时我每天都会去那里上的艺术学校;上课前,我总会在路边的一家小商店买一块巧克力和一杯樱桃汁。炸弹落在离那家商店仅几米远的地方。

Bombs hit areas I have known my whole life. This spring, an airstrike hit the street I used to walk down to go to art school as a child, where I would stop at a little shop to buy a chocolate bar and cherry juice before class. The bomb landed a few meters away from the shop.

终于,在8月4日,炸弹落在了我家附近。其中一枚炸弹击中了我家隔壁的建筑物;另一枚炸弹将那家我曾与家人共度许多快乐时光的格鲁吉亚餐厅炸成了废墟。周围到处都是被连根拔起的树木,烧毁的汽车横倒在街道上。在我住的楼里,窗户被炸毁,楼上的阳台框架也严重受损。到了9月底,又一次袭击引发了大火,烧毁了我家附近的几十套公寓。

Finally, on Aug. 4, bombs landed near home. One struck the building next to mine; the other reduced the Georgian restaurant where I had spent so many happy family moments to rubble. All around, trees were uprooted and burned-out cars lay overturned in the street. In my own building, alongside blown-out windows, damaged balcony frames hung from the upper floors. Then, in late September, another attack sparked a large blaze that ravaged several dozen flats next to mine.

我的房子虽然幸免于难,但战争结束后,我还有地方可回吗?在内心深处,我知道这个故事的结局会是什么。

My home has survived, but will I have anywhere to return to, when the war is over? Deep down, I know how this story will end.

报道由康斯坦特·梅厄(Constant Méheut)提供。

Constant Méheut contributed reporting.