对在伊朗战争中阵亡者的家属而言，这个退伍军人节承载着深切的失去 军人家庭正经历着悲痛、自豪与愤怒交织的情绪，同时也在寻求亲人死亡的答案。
For Families of Those Who Died in the Iran War, a Veterans Day of Profound Loss Military families are navigating feelings of grief, pride and anger, as well as seeking answers about the deaths of their loved ones.
届时将有游行和军乐队。有挥舞的旗帜和敬献的花圈。政客们将发表演讲，朋友们将举杯致意，平民们将默哀片刻。这一切都是为了向美国军人致敬，无论现在还是永远。
There will be parades and marching bands. Flag-waving and wreath-laying. Politicians will make speeches, friends will raise glasses and civilians will observe moments of silence. All to honor America’s service members, now and forever.
但对于那些在伊朗战争中失去海外亲人的人来说，这个退伍军人节带着一种只有军人家庭才能体会的沉重。这场战争自2月28日打响以来持续至今，而随着他们迎来第一个没有儿子女儿、兄弟姐妹和配偶的节日季，这种沉重只会更加难以承受。
But for those who have lost loved ones overseas in the Iran war, which has been waged since Feb. 28, this Veterans Day comes with a heaviness that only military families can fathom, and that will grow only more difficult as they face their first holiday season without their sons and daughters, siblings and spouses.
“退伍军人节现在很不一样了，”查尔斯·西蒙斯说。他的儿子、军士长泰勒·西蒙斯今年3月在伊拉克因一架加油机坠毁而丧生。他还说：“它有了完全不同的含义，因为它来到了家门口。丧钟为你而鸣。”
“Veterans Day is very different now,” said Charles Simmons, the father of Master Sgt. Tyler Simmons, who died in a refueling plane crash in Iraq in March. He added: “It takes on a whole different meaning because it’s come home. The bell tolls for thee.”
西蒙斯说，他和家人对儿子取得的所有成就“怀有深深的自豪”。但他说，最重要的是，“我们心中有一个深深的空洞”。
Mr. Simmons said that he and his family “have a profound sense of pride” for all of his son’s accomplishments. But above all else, he said, there is “a profound hole in our hearts.”
“我是个自私的家长，”他说，“我宁愿要我的儿子。我的孩子是为了拯救国家而牺牲的。这听起来很高尚。但从大局来看，谁想要这样？我想我不认识任何会心甘情愿献出自己孩子生命的人。”西蒙斯是众多刚刚开始面对悲痛、自豪与愤怒交织情绪的人之一，他们渴望弄清亲人在战争中死亡的真相。这场战争已造成至少23名军人死亡、近900人受伤。以下是三个家庭在缅怀逝去亲人时的感言。
“I’m a selfish parent,” he said. “I would rather have my son. My child was sacrificed to save the country. That sounds noble. But in the grand scheme of things, who wants that? I don’t think I know anyone who would just willingly volunteer their child’s life.”Mr. Simmons is one of many people newly navigating mixed feelings of grief, pride and anger, and a yearning for answers about the deaths of their relatives in a war that has left at least 23 service members dead and nearly 900 injured. Here are reflections of three families as they honor those they lost.
对米娅·斯温顿来说，在北卡罗来纳州费耶特维尔一年一度的退伍军人节游行中行进，曾经是一件引以为豪的事。她是一名陆军退伍军人，2020年与丈夫迈克尔·斯温顿中士在巴林部署期间相识。
Ensuring a connection Marching at the annual Veterans Day parade in Fayetteville, N.C., was once a point of pride for Mia Swinton, an Army veteran who met her husband, Sgt. Michael Swinton, while they were deployed in Bahrain in 2020.
但今年斯温顿女士不会去参加游行，而是要去丈夫的墓地祭扫。她30岁的丈夫今年夏天在伊拉克一次对伊朗无人机的受控引爆中被飞溅的碎片击中身亡。
But instead of going to the parade this year, Ms. Swinton will visit the grave of her husband, 30, who was killed over the summer by flying debris during a controlled detonation of an Iranian drone in Iraq.
“我报效过我的国家，我也曾部署在外，”她说，“后来我丈夫也在服役，我为此感到骄傲。但现在一切都不一样了。”斯温顿女士说，她最近感到愤怒，主要是对美国政府，因为丈夫被部署在外。他们4岁的女儿本可以还有父亲。他还有一段前次婚姻留下的儿子。
“I served my country, I deployed as well,” she said, “and then my husband was serving, and I was proud of that. But it’s just different now.”Ms. Swinton said she was feeling angry lately, primarily at the U.S. government, over her husband’s deployment. Their 4-year-old daughter would still have her father. He also had a son from a previous marriage.
但斯温顿女士也说，斯温顿中士为自己的服役感到自豪，热爱自己的工作。身穿制服的人员打电话告诉她丈夫阵亡的消息后，她立刻铺开了陆军旗帜和美国国旗。
But Ms. Swinton also said Sergeant Swinton was proud of his service and loved his job. She laid out the Army flag and the American flag immediately after uniformed men called to tell her that her husband had been killed.
她4岁的女儿全都听到了。在学校里，这个幼儿最近看到一名警察放飞无人机时，忍不住问妈妈：“这是好无人机还是坏无人机？”斯温顿女士说，在斯温顿中士去世前几天，他对能否回家变得悲观。他告诉她和他的前妻，他想确保自己的孩子得到照顾。
Her 4-year-old heard it all. And at school, when the toddler recently saw a police officer fly a drone, she couldn’t help but ask her mother: “Is it a good drone or a bad drone?”Days before Sergeant Swinton died, he became pessimistic about his return home, Ms. Swinton said. He told her and his ex-wife that he wanted to make sure his children were taken care of.
斯温顿女士说她想兑现这个承诺；上个月，斯温顿中士的孩子们和各自的母亲一起乘游轮去了巴哈马，这对同父异母的兄妹在那里增进了感情。
Ms. Swinton said she wanted to fulfill that promise; last month, Sergeant Swinton’s children took a cruise to the Bahamas with their mothers, where the siblings bonded.
斯温顿女士说：“我们都只是想让他们知道，他们因迈克尔而彼此相连。他们是彼此与父亲的纽带。我们都觉得他们被夺走了。”拉近距离31岁的阿里亚娜·G·萨维诺上尉与西蒙斯中士在伊拉克死于同一场加油机坠毁事故。此后几个月里，她的父母一直感到有一股力量促使他们搬到波多黎各。他们就把女儿安葬在那里；女儿对自己的波多黎各根脉和对军旅生涯一样自豪。
“We both just want them to know that they’re connected through Michael,” Ms. Swinton said. “They are each other’s link to their dad. We both feel like they were robbed.”Closing the distance In the months since Capt. Ariana G. Savino, 31, died in the same refueling plane crash in Iraq as Sergeant Simmons, her parents have felt a pull to move to Puerto Rico. That is where they buried their daughter, who felt as much pride for her Puerto Rican roots as she did her military career.
奥迈拉·林斯说，萨维诺上尉的父母一登上从波多黎各圣胡安飞回华盛顿州肯特的航班——肯特是女儿长大的地方附近——她和丈夫“就已经知道，离开”安葬的女儿“是个错误”。
As soon as Captain Savino’s parents boarded their flight home from San Juan, P.R., to Kent, Wash., near where their daughter was raised, Omayra Linse said that she and her husband “already knew it was a mistake to be leaving” their buried daughter behind.
过去几个月，他们打包了在华盛顿的生活，于10月28日——萨维诺上尉的生日——在波多黎各的家中安顿下来。在这座岛上，女儿的回忆处处浮现，尤其是在海滩；她的父母说，她曾在那里寻求慰藉。
After spending the past few months packing up their lives in Washington, they settled into their home in Puerto Rico on Oct. 28, Captain Savino’s birthday. Memories of their daughter surface everywhere on the island, especially at the beach, where her parents say she sought refuge.
军方官员让萨维诺上尉的家人选择是否将她安葬在弗吉尼亚州阿灵顿国家公墓。他们决定不走这条路，而是努力走完繁琐的程序，争取在那里为女儿设一处纪念标志，并将她安葬在她称之为家的地方。
When military officials gave Captain Savino’s family the option of burying her at Arlington National Cemetery in Virginia, they decided to pursue the arduous process of trying to get a memorial marker there for their daughter instead and burying her at the place she called home.
林斯夫妇原计划在佛罗里达州中部度过退伍军人节，萨维诺上尉的许多朋友都住在那里。今年1月，萨维诺上尉的父母最后一次见到活着的她；她告诉他们，她迫不及待想开始在中东的部署，好去接替其他人。
The Linses planned to spend Veterans Day in Central Florida, where many of Captain Savino’s friends live. In January, the last time Captain Savino’s parents saw her alive, she told them she was itching to start her deployment in the Middle East so she could relieve others.
谈到今年的退伍军人节，林斯女士说：“现在这件事太切身了。你会想到那些在我们之前做出牺牲的人，但以前我没有一张面孔。现在它有了一张面孔。”萨维诺上尉的父亲达伦·林斯说，他想到女儿作为空军一名获勋飞行员，曾激励其他年轻人参军服役。
“It’s so personal now,” Ms. Linse said about this Veterans Day. “You think of the people that have sacrificed before us, but I didn’t have a face. Now it has a face.”Darren Linse, Captain Savino’s father, said that he thought about how his daughter, a decorated pilot in the Air Force, had inspired other young people to serve.
林斯说：“如果人们不只记得她是如何死去的，那就好了。你希望人们记住阿丽亚娜是如何生活的。她在31年里度过了极其丰富的一生。她不只是自己取得了这些非凡的成就，还帮助别人相信他们也能做到。”寻求慰藉对西蒙斯中士的父亲西蒙斯先生来说，退伍军人节是俄亥俄州哥伦布家中一系列活动和节日的开端，而这些都将因他独子的缺席而变得不同。
“It’d be nice that people don’t simply remember how she died,” Mr. Linse said. “You want people to remember how Ariana lived. She packed an extraordinary amount of life into 31 years. She didn’t just simply achieve these remarkable things herself. She helped others believe they could achieve them too.”Seeking solace For Mr. Simmons, the father of Sergeant Simmons, Veterans Day is the beginning of a series of events and holidays at home in Columbus, Ohio, that will be defined by the absence of his only son.
“这苦乐参半，因为每次有新的活动，都是甜蜜的，我们很高兴他受到表彰，”他说，“但这确实又揭开了伤口。”西蒙斯中士从高中起就想当飞行员，并于2017年开始训练。他第一次起飞、飞行并降落一架飞机时，从哥伦布飞到俄亥俄州代顿约70英里，这让他的父亲感到惊讶。
“It’s bittersweet because every time there’s a new event, it’s sweet, and we’re glad that he’s being honored,” he said, “but it does reopen the wound again.”Sergeant Simmons had wanted to be a pilot since high school and began training in 2017. His father was amazed the first time he took off, flew and landed a plane about 70 miles from Columbus to Dayton, Ohio.
他喜欢军队的条理性，想成为一名加油操作教员，指导学员为战斗机加油。最终，他希望成为一家大型航空公司的商业飞行员。西蒙斯中士热爱飞行，会给父亲发天空的照片。
He enjoyed the structure of the military and wanted to become a boom operator instructor, someone who guides students through refueling fighter jets. Eventually he wished to become a commercial pilot for a major airline. Sergeant Simmons loved being in the air and would send his father photos of the sky.
西蒙斯先生说，他的儿子死时正在做他热爱的事，但在2月部署前，他告诉父亲他有不祥的预感，认为自己可能回不来。
Mr. Simmons said his son died doing what he loved, but before his deployment in February he told his father he had a premonition and believed he might not make it back.
如今，西蒙斯先生对导致儿子死亡的坠机事件有许多未解之谜，内心充满挣扎。最近，他一直在思考这场战争是否必要，以及儿子的死是否值得，以换取未来可能拯救许多其他人生命的可能性。
Today, Mr. Simmons wrestles with many unanswered questions about the crash that killed his son. And lately, he has thought about whether the war was necessary and whether his son’s death was worth the possibility of saving the lives of many others in the future.
他说，他曾一度“不堪重负”，但他用音乐抒发悲伤，骑摩托车寻求慰藉，并依靠基督教信仰。
He was “so overwhelmed” at one point, he said, but he writes music about his grief, seeks refuge on his motorcycle and leans on his Christian faith.
“我曾经相信同一个上帝会保护我的儿子，现在我必须相信他会治愈我的心，”他说。但这是一个过程。“总有一天我会更好地理解这件事。”
“The same God that I trusted to protect my son, now I have to trust to heal my heart,” he said. But it’s a process. “I’ll understand it better at some point.”